Pondering Lifetimes

Sunday, November 16, 2003

Two bazaars and the Greenhills tiangge pretty much summed up my second weekend ~~without work~~ off. And now I'm tired. I didn't buy anything, except for this pretty bracelet in the Metrobank bazaar which I have to pay my dad later on (as the merchants in that bazaar will only accept payments through a Metrobank card). It sort of dawned on me today that Christmas is kind of near already. Eep. I don't particularly enjoy the season when it becomes work-related because the work piles up and means more headaches for us. Sheesh.

I'm feeling pretty bogged down at work because most of my friends are filing their resignations this week or next. I feel bad for our super because they're leaving not because of the team, but because of the work, work conditions, etc (or so I heard), but it might be taken the wrong way. I can sort of relate to their issues and we may be airing it out soon, so we'll see na lang what happens next. Everyone keeps asking me when I will go (as Bliz has said, I was the one very vocal about leaving months ago) and I just shrug. I have a vague idea about what I want to do next, but I don't want to leave yet because I have nowhere to go. And yes, I will go if something better comes along, even if it means leaving Crushable (they don't think I can leave Crushable. Hah! I can. Especially since I know he has a girlfriend! Of course I can move on--it's just a crush, right?).

Hay naku, if I only could, I would just spend my days writing or doing other things my choice. I would especially love to start writing again. I mean, I stopped writing in college because I was filled with Accounting and Finance and all the writing I did was for various industry papers (and my journal, but that was really just me whining). I stopped writing essays and short stories (the latter, I realized, I cannot do--just like poetry!). I forgot how to make titles which was the bane of my existence while working on the high school paper, but I eventually learned to like it. I forgot how to end paragraphs nicely. I forgot how fun it was to write and end essays and let someone read/criticize it. I miss writing. Maybe one day, I'll attend classes on writing again. The one and only time I did that was the summer before fourth year high school and that was fun! I was inspired by my teacher and vowed to do what he wrote as a farewell dedication to me. I miss writing. I miss the stuff I used to do, but right now I'm trying out this "corporate" thing and I am wondering if I do fit in and if I'll grow there... although I know deep inside, I'll always go back to writing (or something to do with that).

Posted at 10:15 PM |

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